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Arranging a funeral
Whether you are making advance arrangements for your own funeral or planning the funeral of a relative or close friend, it can be difficult to make decisions in what may be an upsetting time. There are many different types of funerals to choose from and financial help may also be available. This section contains information about the different options and where you can go for help and advice.
Making plans for your own funeral
You may have reached a time in your life when you are starting to think about making plans for your funeral. This could be as simple as letting your family know your preferences, or you may wish to make more formal arrangements. This can be done by putting your preferences in writing and can be used to inform your relatives or friends of the type of funeral you would like. Information could include whether you want to be buried or cremated; which hymns, music and flowers you would prefer; who to contact following your death; and any other instructions that you would like them to follow. You may find it useful to read the BBC’s guide Planning a good death which has more information on this.
Pre-paid funeral plans
If you want to make arrangements to pay for your own funeral, you may like to consider taking out a pre-paid funeral plan. This means that you pay a lump sum or a monthly amount towards your funeral, allowing you to make your own arrangements. This has the advantage of ensuring that your funeral is carried out to your specifications, and also means that your family or friends will not have to take on this responsibility after your death.
There are many companies offering pre-paid funeral plans and you should obtain at least three quotes before deciding on which one to use. You should check that the company is a member of the Funeral Planning Authority (FPA), which regulates the funeral plan industry and has a code of practice that members have to comply with. Contact the FPA using the details given below, or visit their website for further information.
Organ donation
You may like to consider donating your organs after your death. This is a very personal decision but you could discuss it with your family and friends so that they are aware of your wishes. Visit our section on Giving blood and organ donation for further information.
Arranging someone else’s funeral
A funeral can be arranged for anytime after the death has been registered. You should check to see if the deceased person left any instructions in their will, or elsewhere, as to what their preferences for the funeral would be. You should also check to see if they had a pre-paid funeral plan or had already made the arrangements.
In some circumstances, the Council may be able to arrange and pay for the funeral on your behalf. For example, if the deceased has no funds or assets available to pay for a funeral and/or there is no one else who is able to arrange or claim benefit for the funeral. For further information about this, contact the Register Office at Newcastle City Council using the details given on the Newcastle City Council website.
Using a funeral director
Most people choose to use a funeral director (previously referred to as an undertaker). This can be very helpful as they have the knowledge and experience to organise the funeral as quickly and efficiently as possible. The funeral director can help with things such as:
- where to rest the body before the funeral
- time and place of the funeral
- type of service
- how much to spend
- putting a notice in the newspaper
You may know of a funeral director that you trust, but if not, you can find a reputable firm by speaking to the National Association of Funeral Directors. Contact them using the details given below, or visit their website to search for a funeral director in your area. All firms that are registered with the National Association of Funeral Directors follow a code of practice, so you can be sure that you will receive a high quality service.
Arranging the funeral yourself
Some people prefer not to use a funeral director and to arrange the funeral themselves. Although this can be a complex procedure, it can also be very rewarding, and can help some people to come to terms with the death of their loved one. It can also be significantly cheaper than using a funeral director. Arrangements that will need to be made could include:
- looking after the body and preparing it for the funeral
- booking a slot at a church, cemetery or crematorium
- choosing the coffin
- arranging someone to deliver the service
- arranging transport
- choosing music and flowers
- grave digging, if necessary
- organising people to carry the coffin
Some of these tasks may be distressing and it is not advisable to try and carry out all of the arrangements on your own, so ask another family member or friend for help. Some funeral directors may give advice and guidance on how to plan a funeral but they will probably charge for this service. Visit The Natural Death Centre website for information and advice, or contact them using the details given below.
Types of funeral
Although all bodies must be buried or cremated, there are several options as to the type of service and how and where the funeral takes place. If the deceased person has not specified the type of funeral they would like, you should consider what you think their wishes would have been. It is a good idea to talk to other people who knew them and to discuss this between you.
It is important to remember that some religions have strict guidelines regarding this, for example, Muslims must always be buried and Hindus must always be cremated. You should ensure that you are aware of the person’s faith when making arrangements for the funeral. Visit the If I Should Die website for further information about different religious customs.
Traditional burials and cremation
A traditional burial usually takes place in a churchyard or in a cemetery. Anyone living within a parish has a right to be buried in the parish churchyard, if there is space. Cemeteries are usually owned by local authorities or private companies, and most are non-denominational. In most cemeteries there are various categories of graves and costs will vary. You should contact the cemetery for a copy of their brochure, which will state the current prices.
Most crematoria are run by local authorities, and the costs of a cremation will usually be significantly less than a burial. Again, you should contact the local crematorium for their brochure so that you can check prices. Sometimes the scattering or burying of the ashes in a garden of remembrance will be included in the fee. For further information about all aspects of cremation, visit The Cremation Society of Great Britain’s website.
For the current prices for cemeteries and crematoria in Newcastle, visit the Newcastle City Council website.
If you don’t want the ashes to be scattered or buried at a crematorium, churchyard or cemetery, they can be scattered almost anywhere else. If you wish to scatter ashes on private land, you should get consent from the landowner first.
Humanist funerals
Having a humanist funeral may be appropriate for people who did not place a significance on religion, as a religious service may feel inappropriate or insincere. Humanist non-religious funeral ceremonies acknowledge loss and celebrate a life without employing religious rituals. They offer a dignified alternative to the traditional funeral service and are made memorable by being personally tailored to each individual situation, with the wishes of the family taken fully into account. The funeral officiant will speak to the family or friends and prepare a personal ceremony, celebrating the life of the deceased person. In much the same way as a traditional religious funeral, there will usually be readings, music and time for reflection.
To find out more about humanism and their funeral ceremonies, visit the British Humanist Association website, or use their search facility to find a humanist funeral officiant in your area. You can also contact them for further information using the details given below.
The North East Humanists will also be able to help you. To find out more, contact the Tyneside branch using the details given below, or visit their website.
Woodland burials or ‘green’ funerals
'Green burials' are becoming increasingly popular and there are a number of commercial sites opening around the country, promoting eco-friendly funerals and more informal ceremonies. At woodland burial grounds relatives may be able to plant a tree to mark the site either on or near the grave. At nature reserve burial grounds, which can be wild flower meadows or pastures, graves are either unmarked or may be marked by a small wooden plaque that will rot away naturally, and bulbs and flowers can be planted.
For those not using a funeral director, cardboard and wooden coffins are obtainable, as well as woollen shrouds. However, an increasing number of funeral directors will offer assistance with a woodland burial, such as providing transport for the body and cardboard coffins. A list of woodland burial grounds is available from The Natural Death Centre. Visit their website, or contact them using the details given below.
Memorials
Many people wish to mark the final resting place of someone with a memorial. A memorial can be a traditional stone memorial that is erected in cemeteries or churchyards; a plaque marking where ashes have been laid; a memorial bench; or even a more personal sculpture or artwork. A memorial represents a lasting symbol of remembrance and is a tribute to the deceased person.
For further information about the different types of memorials available from Newcastle City Council, contact the Bereavement Services Office using the details given below.
Paying for a funeral
If you arrange a funeral you will be responsible for paying the bill, so first check where the money will come from and that there will be enough. Funeral costs can be paid in different ways, including:
- with money from the deceased's estate
- by any funeral scheme the deceased was paying into, or their pre-paid funeral plan - you'll need to check their paperwork to see if a plan exists
- with any payout from a life insurance policy or pension scheme
The bank account of the person who has died will be frozen (unless it is a joint account). In some cases, the bank or building society may agree to release funds to pay for funeral costs, although they are not obliged to do this until probate is granted. If they don't release funds, you or the executor may need to pay and then recover the money from the estate later.
If you're on a low income and need financial help to pay for a funeral you're arranging, you may be able to get a one-off Funeral Payment from the Social Fund. You might have to repay some or all of it from the estate of the person who died. Eligibility for a Funeral Payment depends on the benefits you're getting, your relationship with the person who died, and any other money that may be available to help with the cost of the funeral. For further information about Funeral Payments, visit the Direct.gov website.
Help and advice
Newcastle Bereavement Services are based in Newcastle Civic Centre. They can provide you with help and advice about registering a death, arranging a funeral, choosing a memorial, and information about cemeteries and crematoria in Newcastle. Contact them using the details given below.
Other useful information
Contact Information
Bereavement Services Office
Room 40, Civic Centre, Barras Bridge, Newcastle upon Tyne, NE1 8PB.
Telephone : (0191) 211 6941 or (0191) 211 6942, Fax : (0191) 211 6957.
Email : sandra.pearce@newcastle.gov.uk
British Humanist Association
1 Gower Street, London, WC1E 6HD.
Telephone : 020 7079 3580, Fax : 020 7079 3588.
Email : info@humanism.org.uk
Funeral Planning Authority
Knellstone House, Udimore, Rye, East Sussex, TN31 6AR.
Telephone : 0845 601 9619.
Email : info@funeralplanningauthority.co.uk
National Association of Funeral Directors
618 Warwick Road, Solihull, West Midlands, B91 1AA.
Telephone : 0845 230 1343, Fax : 0121 711 1351.
Email : info@nafd.org.uk
North East Humanists
43 Fern Avenue, Jesmond, Newcastle upon Tyne, NE2 2QU.
Telephone : 0191 281 2808.
Email : NorthEast@Humanists.net
The Natural Death Centre
In The Hill House, Watley Lane, Twyford, Winchester, SO21 1QX.
Telephone : 0871 288 2098.
Email : contact@naturaldeath.org.uk
Article last updated November 22, 2011 8:19 pm
